I got shot atlast night. The weird thing is I wasnt even on duty. Well I was in big doodie making doodie actually. I think it was one o them boca burgers that started the whol mess. LIke I said in my other posts I beendieteing really good and started eating healthy ... maybe TO healthy. I think the veggie burger didn't agree with my stomach. I ended up running to the Port Authority bathroom with my cheeks clenched and bearly go my pants down before I let loose with one of the biggest cases of dia reear I ever had. Im not kiddin. I was bowled over ... over the bowl. I didnt even have anough time to wipe the seat down properly. Theree wernet none of those paper seat covers eeither so I had to quicly drape tissue over the seat.... Ugh.
So while Im in there soe guy starts nockin on the door. I said its in use. So he nocks again. I say agian, occupied. So he starts nockin again. Well at this point Im grittin my teeth trying to keep it together becase my bowels are bein ripped apart and I KNOW that theres other stall swith no one in em so I say Get the hell a way from my stall and use aothe or Im gonna shoot your sorry ass! Suddenly 3 bullets tear through my stall door--each one missin becaus criminals are terrible shots. Holy crap I yell then pull my gun from my shoulder harness and aim strate at the door. Nothin. The punk ran off. And there I am with my pants down shittin likehteres no tomorro. And seriously, there almost was no tomrrow. Which is today if ya get what I mean.
When I got done doin my thing I called it in. I was ther for a few hours going over survellance tapes and interviewin witnesses. Good thing though because I had to use the can a few more times. I lost 2 pounds thanks to the stomach bug and the little shit who tooka shot at me. Cant say Im TO unhappy about that.
--Gristle out
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